Women of a Certain Age?

The Battle of the Grays

Like many women, I spent time and money fighting the inevitable until one day, sitting in the salon chair, it finally hit me right on my newly dyed hair. As I handed the $200 plus the obligatory tip to the happy camper with his hand out, I started calculating how much I had spent coloring my hair since I first noticed a few strands of gray. Truth be told, I could have purchased a new car with the dollars I had spent trying to stay young.

Next, I thought about the number of hours I had spent in the salon chair or standing in my bathroom with a box of DIY hair color. If I added up those hours, I could retired from a second job with a decent pension.

I decide to go au naturale, to let my hair go gray, to be my authentic self. Well, easier said than done. I was two months into the grow out when I succumbed to the dye job. Another $200 plus gone. But I was determined that I would not falter again. Instead, I spent money on hats and head coverings, figuring I could keep the unsightly white growth hidden until my hair was long enough to cut into a decent Pixie style. My hair grows really fast, so I imagined I would be good to go within three or four months.

But, as luck would have it, on a hot summer day while I was out trimming the hedge, a gust of wind came along a blew my hair right off my head. The little boy next door had been outside playing, but as I continued to trim, I noticed him staring at me, edging closer and closer until he was standing next to me. He reached up and touched my hair.

“Wow!” he said. “My mom does hers different. She puts the dark next to her head. I never saw anyone with the dark at the bottom.”

It took a few seconds, but I finally realized the little bugger was talking about my white roots. My first thought was to smack him, but with gray hair comes better sense, I suppose. I refrained. But, once I was inside the house, hot and sweaty, I stared at my two tone hair, two inch white roots clinging to the five inches of dyed hair.

Dog clippers in hand, I shaved my head. I don’t recommend going to the extreme, but as most of my friends know, with me it is all or nothing. I went all in and ended up with nothing! Not a hair on my imperfectly shaped head. I do have a ridge across the top of my head. Who knew?

Being bald is an experience. First there were the whispers. No one dared approach me, but several of my husband’s friends asked if I was sick and offered well wishes. Even when I wore a hat or a head covering, people

Let me say this now. I have the greatest respect for those who are battling cancer and undergoing chemotherapy. I have several friends who have lost their hair as a result of chemo. I am not making light of their battles. Chemotherapy is brutal. I have seen bodies ravaged by cancer and the treatments. My heart goes out to them.

That said, I had another interesting experience. One of my husband’s younger co-workers said, “I like the haircut. It really accents your eyes. Women don’t realize their beauty is in their eyes, not their hair.” Okay, so maybe he’s an outlier. Most men love long hair. But, for a few weeks, the compliment got me through the porcupine spell.

Yes! When my hair started growing I went through several stages. First, my head looked like a kiwi fruit. Then I graduated to a coconut and finally to a cross between a porcupine and a hedgehog. If I’m honest, I loved every stage. Of course, today we see women everywhere with shave heads or buzz cuts.

Here’s the other thing about new gray hair. It doesn’t feel the same as the hair that covered the noggin before. Mine grew back as straight as a horse’s tail and with about the same texture, except for the fringe areas. Around the nape of the neck and around the ears, my hair didn’t grow from the scalp. It seemed to screw out of my head. All these years later, the texture of the gray hair remains as it first grew — screwy and straight.

Does Gray Hair Make You Look Older?

Personally, I don’t think gray or white makes us look older. In fact, in some cases, I think it makes us look younger, especially if you are using darker colors to cover it. Nature has a way of adjusting our skin tones to go with our natural hair color, but in the end, the call is up to you.

I may be going out on a limb here, but I’m going to say it anyway. I think our attitudes make us look older or younger, more than our hair color. The Old Ladies on the Loose range in age between 72 and 89 and we embrace it.